Reverb '12: Days 28 - 30

Continuing with Reverb '12 with Kat @ I Saw You Dancing... Days 25 - 27.

Day 28: How will you overcome *those* fears? Think of three things that daunted you in 2012: how are you going to work towards overcoming them in 2013?

Textures thanks to Pixel Dust: Intensify, Vintage Vellum

Texture thanks to Lenabem-Anna: old map

Let's forget the little fears and those limited to 2012, and jump right to the big ones! Lifetime fears. But I do want to clarify that none of these are imminent ... they are just my greatest fears ... ending up a bag lady, dying alone, and spending my final days with Alzheimer's.

I know, you are probably wondering why I'm concerned about these things since I've got lots of years of living yet to do. These are not things I spend my days worrying about ... they just float in and out periodically, although there are days as I search for work, get interviews, and am not hired that I wonder about the first one.

So, how am I going to overcome these things? The answers are pretty simple really, but as we all know ... sometimes easier said than done.

I am pretty sure I won't become a bag lady. First, I know eventually I will get a job. The angels just haven't aligned the right people and the right opening yet. ;-> Once I am employed, I will be very grateful and will be able to focus on other things ... things that bring more pleasure than a job search.

Although I fear being alone, I can't imagine I am ever really alone. I have friends and family who come through in my darkest hours. I tend to be pretty self-sufficient and sometimes I isolate ... so there you are ... I create the aloneness all by myself!

And about Alzheimer's ... I value intelligence and mental acuity so much, that this is the last way I want to spend my end days. I don't believe I have anything to be concerned about, but it's those little things I tend to forget that niggle at me. Keeping active, continuing to learn, and working with my memory are the best antidotes I'm sure.

Day 29: Have you heard your word? What word did you select to be your travelling companion in 2012? What gifts did this word bring? What word will you choose to guide you through 2013? What do you hope it will bring into your life?

Textures thanks to Shadowhouse Creations: Square 15, 162
Textures thanks to Pixel Dust: Silken Waters

ABUNDANCE was my word for 2012. It played out quite differently than I thought it would. I often think of this word in respect to financial security, but I was pleasantly surprised at the ways it appeared. There were those who stood by me when I needed support; there was the new community of Flickr and blogger friends I gathered along the way; and of course as I've mentioned before, there was time ... time to explore, time to learn, and time to reflect and dream.

On Day 3 of this Reverb, I thought I'd found my word for 2013 ... clarity, but now I really believe CONTENTMENT will be my guiding word for the new year. If I can learn to be satisfied with who I am, what I'm doing, and where I'm going, life will be much easier. I find myself always striving ... striving to be more perfect, to be better. This can be self-defeating in some ways. My goal is to appreciate what is ... to love what is ... right now.

Day 30: What can you celebrate NOW? Often we see our life as a humongous journey, and we believe that not only have we not arrived at our far away desired destination, but we also think we must accomplish x, y, and z, before we can declare with satisfaction that we are THERE. For a moment, take a close look at who you are NOW. See what you can declare. Merge the past, present, and future into one big ARRIVAL. Describe joyously and in great celebration the BEING that you ARE.

Textures thanks to Kim Klassen: awaken, nutmeg

Celebrating the NOW is an interesting concept. I seem to find myself in the past or future so often. But I have spent more time in the now recently.

What I know for sure is I feel more relaxed, and more at home out on a walking path or Colorado trail enjoying the beauty of the world around me, spending time with my furry friend, and discovering new photographic captures. I think this year, I will venture out to places I haven't been before again ... like I did in 2011 when I created newsletters I called The Stroll.

Discovering is always fun ... can't wait to see what awaits. Finding more places where I can just be me.