Reverb '12: Day 31 ... Happy New Year, 2013!

Closing a month of Reverb '12 with Kat @ I Saw You Dancing... Day 31.

I end this project with mixed feelings knowing it is not an end at all ... I have loved creating an image a day for 31 days in response to Kat's prompts, but it takes time and inspiration that I am relieved to take a break from for a bit. I hope you have enjoyed my journey and that it has inspired you to consider your own.

Day 31: Where are you now?

Think back to where you were all those moons ago, on 1 December when you started #reverb12. All the way back then, I asked: "How are you starting?" Now quickly and without thinking too much about it, finish these five sentences:

2013 is going to be MY YEAR because ... I deserve it! I've weathered the storm. I've done the right things. I've learned new skills. It will be my year because I am and I want it to be.

In 2013, I am going to do ... good work ... both in my next job and in my creative work. I am going to honor the promises I make to myself just as I honor promises I make to others. I want to learn Illustrator.

In 2013, I am going to feel ... joyous, happy, and fulfilled.

In 2013, I am not going to ... constantly chip away at the good I offer by thinking I have to be different.

In December 2013, I am going to look back and say ...  I did it! I created a better life for me and for those I touch. I brought joy to others through my writing and photographic creations. I did a good job.

Textures thanks to Shadowhouse Creations: DirtyWall-5, GF-6, Stained-5

Textures thanks to Kim Klassen: 0101, 3112

And here is the complete Reverb '12 ... 31 days of images reflecting on 2012 and looking toward 2013.

Click image to see larger view

Wishing all my friends and family a Happy New Year! May 2013 bring fulfilled dreams and lots of new joyous experiences.

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   ^^^

I toast a glass to you, my friends!!

Reverb '12: Days 28 - 30

Continuing with Reverb '12 with Kat @ I Saw You Dancing... Days 25 - 27.

Day 28: How will you overcome *those* fears? Think of three things that daunted you in 2012: how are you going to work towards overcoming them in 2013?

Textures thanks to Pixel Dust: Intensify, Vintage Vellum

Texture thanks to Lenabem-Anna: old map

Let's forget the little fears and those limited to 2012, and jump right to the big ones! Lifetime fears. But I do want to clarify that none of these are imminent ... they are just my greatest fears ... ending up a bag lady, dying alone, and spending my final days with Alzheimer's.

I know, you are probably wondering why I'm concerned about these things since I've got lots of years of living yet to do. These are not things I spend my days worrying about ... they just float in and out periodically, although there are days as I search for work, get interviews, and am not hired that I wonder about the first one.

So, how am I going to overcome these things? The answers are pretty simple really, but as we all know ... sometimes easier said than done.

I am pretty sure I won't become a bag lady. First, I know eventually I will get a job. The angels just haven't aligned the right people and the right opening yet. ;-> Once I am employed, I will be very grateful and will be able to focus on other things ... things that bring more pleasure than a job search.

Although I fear being alone, I can't imagine I am ever really alone. I have friends and family who come through in my darkest hours. I tend to be pretty self-sufficient and sometimes I isolate ... so there you are ... I create the aloneness all by myself!

And about Alzheimer's ... I value intelligence and mental acuity so much, that this is the last way I want to spend my end days. I don't believe I have anything to be concerned about, but it's those little things I tend to forget that niggle at me. Keeping active, continuing to learn, and working with my memory are the best antidotes I'm sure.

Day 29: Have you heard your word? What word did you select to be your travelling companion in 2012? What gifts did this word bring? What word will you choose to guide you through 2013? What do you hope it will bring into your life?

Textures thanks to Shadowhouse Creations: Square 15, 162
Textures thanks to Pixel Dust: Silken Waters

ABUNDANCE was my word for 2012. It played out quite differently than I thought it would. I often think of this word in respect to financial security, but I was pleasantly surprised at the ways it appeared. There were those who stood by me when I needed support; there was the new community of Flickr and blogger friends I gathered along the way; and of course as I've mentioned before, there was time ... time to explore, time to learn, and time to reflect and dream.

On Day 3 of this Reverb, I thought I'd found my word for 2013 ... clarity, but now I really believe CONTENTMENT will be my guiding word for the new year. If I can learn to be satisfied with who I am, what I'm doing, and where I'm going, life will be much easier. I find myself always striving ... striving to be more perfect, to be better. This can be self-defeating in some ways. My goal is to appreciate what is ... to love what is ... right now.

Day 30: What can you celebrate NOW? Often we see our life as a humongous journey, and we believe that not only have we not arrived at our far away desired destination, but we also think we must accomplish x, y, and z, before we can declare with satisfaction that we are THERE. For a moment, take a close look at who you are NOW. See what you can declare. Merge the past, present, and future into one big ARRIVAL. Describe joyously and in great celebration the BEING that you ARE.

Textures thanks to Kim Klassen: awaken, nutmeg

Celebrating the NOW is an interesting concept. I seem to find myself in the past or future so often. But I have spent more time in the now recently.

What I know for sure is I feel more relaxed, and more at home out on a walking path or Colorado trail enjoying the beauty of the world around me, spending time with my furry friend, and discovering new photographic captures. I think this year, I will venture out to places I haven't been before again ... like I did in 2011 when I created newsletters I called The Stroll.

Discovering is always fun ... can't wait to see what awaits. Finding more places where I can just be me.

Reverb '12: Days 25 - 27

Continuing with Reverb '12 with Kat @ I Saw You Dancing... Days 25 - 27.

Day 25: How will you be vulnerable? The soft white underbelly, the flaw in the armor, the Achilles' heel -- weaknesses are what make us the most human, the most beautiful. Next year, how will you tend to your vulnerabilities? How will you build them a shelter from the storm? How will you put them through physical therapy? How will you find a way to make them work to your advantage?

Textures thanks to Kim Klassen: chalkmagic, softly

This was challenging to image and even more challenging to want to divulge publicly. Vulnerabilities and weaknesses are things we try to hide, to keep under wraps, and only share with our closest friends. It's disruptive to my sense of safety to allow my armadillo shell to be cracked open.

With that said, I know I feel most vulnerable when I'm in a situation where true feelings, emotions, and mistakes are revealed before I'm ready. I might never be ready as honesty is not always best presented. You know what I mean ... when someone asks what you think and it's better to save face ... for them and for you. Sometimes keeping true feelings inside is the the best plan of action. And I never like being caught in a mistake, although I make them all the time.

These questions about how to manage vulnerabilities is something I must contemplate. Is it best to attempt to stay away from situations where one feels vulnerable? Is it better to save those times for your truest of friends? Or does it give others permission to be vulnerable if we share? Take for example Brené Brown, who let it all hang out as she did during her Ted Talk on Vulnerability, then she went home wondering why she told 500 people something quite embarassing ... something that felt like it undermined all that she'd done before ... then it went viral!

I love Brené ... but I'm still challenged to let the world know all of who I am even though I know others struggle with similar challenges. What have you stood for that you haven't shared so openly?

Day 26: How will you make time? How do you intend to carve out more time for the things that are the most important to you in 2013?

Textures thanks to Kim Klassen: finale, simplicity, autumnburst

Clock brush thanks to darkaion

I believe I will always make time for the few things that have become vital to my sense of self this year: photography, learning, creativity. But one thing I know about myself is things change. I need to walk for my general health and while I'm out I may as well capture nature's beauty, so I hope to keep that going.

Day 27: How will you honour your creativity? How did you make time for creativity in 2012? Looking back, is there one creative time or one particular creation that stands out for you? (Maybe you could share it here?) How will you continue (or start) making time and space for your creative passions in 2013?

This year I had the gift of time, so was able to share my creativity publicly with amazing consistency. I know I won't be able to keep it up with the same regularity once I get a job, but will still find time to create as I love increasing my skills and it's therapeutic to express myself through pictures and these little art pieces that Reverb '12 has afforded me. I do believe this is a sample of my greatest creative spurt.

The countdown is here. Only four more days and I will have created art every day for a full month. Upon completion, I plan on printing out each piece 4" x 4" and create a poster 20" x 28" for my wall as a reminder of the prompts and contemplations of 2012 and considerations for 2013.

Walk and Click Wednesdays #17: A White Christmas

It's time for Walk and Click Wednesday!

On Christmas Eve day the threat of snow was apparent as the cloud crawled in over the Rocky Mountains.

Here in Lafayette, Colorado we had a light, but beautiful white Christmas. The snow started Christmas Eve and continued lightly through the night. We only got a few inches, but it was wonderful to see the pristine sight in the morning.

And Kobi was wishing he could run and play with Spirit, but that wasn't in the cards this morning. It didn't stop him from Christmas greetings at the fence.

I hope all of your who celebrate Christmas had a wonderful day!

~~~~~

I look forward to seeing you here for Walk and Click Wednesdays. Can't wait to see what you saw on your strolls.

Please join me in the adventure. The only "requirement" other than those below is that you go out walking and take some pictures. Please keep in mind that you don't have to walk, take pictures, process them, and post all on Wednesday ... take the weekend before to explore and a few days to process your photos ... then link up.

Walk and Click Wednesdays (WCW) Guidelines:

Are you new to Walk and Click Wednesdays? The party will open on Wednesday and close on Saturday at midnight.

Here are just a few guidelines to keep everyone on target.

• Please link directly to your WCW blog post or the specific flickr image, not to your main blog url or flickr stream url. Please do not link to an online shop.
• Please link back to laf Custom Designs. I'd love it if you'd share my WCW button on your blog (it's over there on the sidebar--see it?--just under the Friends Who Love It Here icons). It will also serve as a reminder to you since I know you all have a lot going on in your lives.
• Please visit the other WCW participants and share the love. Gotta get this party goin' on.

Have a great weekend and find some time to walk and click. ;->

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Reverb '12: Days 22 - 24

Continuing with Reverb '12 with Kat @ I Saw You Dancing... Days 22 - 24.

Day 22: Your most important gift? What was the greatest gift you received in 2012? What was the greatest gift you gave? What do you intend to give yourself in 2013?

Textures thanks to Kim Klassen: cherishscripted

Textures thanks to Pixel Dust: ImpressionistMusic, HolyGrunge

Textures thanks to Shadowhouse Creations: Raised Effect 2

Textures thanks to Paree Erica: Fireflies VII, Silver Stars
Bow brush thanks to fartoolate

Generosity is the greatest gift I received in 2012. Generosity of spirit, of time, and of friendship. Those in my circles showed they cared and I am so grateful. We all need to know there is someone or many someones who care what happens to us. I really am blessed.

One of my gifts is the creativity I've shared. My hope is that it brings some pleasure to my blog readers. But, I believe the greatest gift I gave is appreciation. I made every effort I could to let people know I appreciated their efforts and their place in my life. I also try my best to be kind, although there are times my frustration gets the best of me.

Just a few days ago, I saw a man at a highway exit hoping a few people might stop and contribute to his well-being. I'm afraid I've become a bit skeptical, but being a bit blue that morning, I decided I could help both of us out. Since I was on my way to Starbucks for my only vice, I decide to double my order of coffee and pumpkin bread. I backtracked out of my way to take it back to him. I gave him the treats and wished him the best. After I left, I felt I missed something I had grown accustomed to doing ... I wished I'd asked his name. And thought I should have asked his story. Another time, I guess. I just wasn't quite myself that morning.

Day 23: What will you let go of? Name three excuses -- stories you tell yourself that are holding you back -- that you are going to let go of in 2013.

Textures thanks to Shadowhouse Creations: 33, 178

Textures thanks to French Kiss: Purple Prose

Mountain brush thanks to 00AngelicDevil00

Three stories I tell myself that hold me back ... hmmm, I hadn't quite bargained for this level of truth-telling, but I know we all have things we don't want to admit even to ourselves.

I have a gigantic critic that resides inside. You know the one ... you can't do that, you don't know enough, you're not good enough. Yep. I said it. But, if I'm really honest, this isn't altogether true. I can do a lot, I know a lot, and I am fine just that way I am even if I do experience those "negative" emotions. Yes, I can be quite judgmental and that seems to lead to anger. I am envious of those who are successful, but this doesn't help me be successful.

So, with that said, those are the things I'd like to let go of: the inner critic, judgment, and envy. That requires a plan ... well, those steps haven't evolved yet, but the week between now and New Year's might be a good time to think on that.

Day 24: What is your most important habit? What is the single most important habit you intend to cultivate in 2013?

Textures thanks to Kim Klassen: gentlewhisper, xanthescripted, ugglove, 123, takeheart

Textures thanks to Shadowhouse Creations: Square-20, 25, 132

I really want to discover a way to transition more of my judgments to kindness and thoughtfulness. This requires mindfulness ... paying attention. This means being more thoughtful and kinder to myself as well. That's where we must begin, isn't it? How can we pass that good on to others if we're beating ourselves up over the stupid things we've done, the mean thoughts we have? So I want to remember the day I helped the baby bird out of the crack in the driveway. We all have stories that cause us pain, the pain that causes us to lash out in annoyance and frustration. To remember this is the first step in showing more grace towards others.

Thanks to Kat for encouraging me to consider this question.

Reverb '12: Days 19 - 21

Continuing with Reverb '12 with Kat @ I Saw You Dancing... Days 19 - 21.

More Reverb creations.

Day 19: How did you nourish yourself? How did you nourish your beautiful body in 2012? What self-care practices will you take with you into 2013?

Textures thanks to Pixel Dust: SoftSwirls, SilkenWaters

Camera brush thanks to Benjirose

Place setting: Lovely Dinner

I can't say I'm feeling the beautiful body thing! But at least I am nourishing it with lots of photo walks, blue skies, sunshine, and fresh air. What I'd like to take into 2013 is a new regime and lose ... ahem ... well some pounds I've gathered along my journey in 2012. Why is this a perennial problem for me? I suppose I should look into that, as well. Shouldn't take much doing. The honest truth is I like my sweets ... and my Starbucks coffee with cream and sugar, and pumpkin or lemon loaf.

I'm not very good at self-care ... so maybe a list is in order to remind me ...

• cut down the sugar and caffeine, so I can develop better sleeping patterns
• walk even more regularly
• start a yoga regime
• reconvene a meditation practice
• journal more regularly and make a point of noting the gratitudes

Day 20: What was lost and what was found? What was lost in 2012? What do you intend to find in 2013?

Textures thanks to Shadowhouse Creations: Square-129, 134, 167, 171, 188

This is a sensitive question. In losing my work, I lost a place to go where I made some contribution, connected with people in person regularly, and collected pay for a day's work. As time goes on this transition begins to take it's toll.

Nevertheless, there is an up-side ... I have enjoyed the freedom to explore my creative side. As Cynthia Morris said in a recent newsletter, "creative play is vital for our happiness." I have known that if I'm not being creative, I'm not living. I also have found that all this photography and processing and creating my own little "art pieces" keeps my mind active and engaged. I feel productive and this brings me great pleasure.

I intend to carry this forward to 2013 as learning is vital to my well-being.

Day 21: What's on the dream list? What items did you tick off your dream list in 2012? What other, unexpected, dreams came to fruition? What are the top three items on your dream list for 2013?
 

Textures thanks to Shadowhouse Creations: Square-129, 163, 173, 191
Textures thanks to Pixel Dust: AbstractSplotches, FadedFresco, Impressionist Music

I can't help myself ... I love this piece. I learned a couple new design tools ... how to use puppet warp and the transform effects, both in the edit panel in Photoshop. These were used to give the word DREAM the curvature to create a pot for my flowers.

Back to dreams ... dreams for me are about growth, expanding, learning ...

Growth comes quietly

Growth comes slowly

It comes by asking

"how do I do that?"

It takes me down a path

of questioning and

searching for the the answer.

and one day I realize

I know more

and can do more.

Google is my friend ... I wanted my word DREAM to have shape, so I went in search for how to do it. Voilà! I found the answer out there in that vast information vessel.

A dream list? This has been a challenge recently. It's hard for me to dream when I'm concerned about the basics, but I also realize that it is the dreaming that will take care of the basics. This is a bit like chasing one's tail ... oh, nevermind that. It's time to consider what I would like to see in this new year; hence, another list.

• replace my old worn out chairs in my living room
• new kitchen faucet
• new flooring -- carpet and/or tile
• proper fence for the back yard
• new cushion/covering for my free swing
• re-establish my office, which requires purging and painting

There, I did it ... I dreamed a few dreams for 2013!

Reverb '12: Days 16 - 18

Continuing with Reverb '12 with Kat @ I Saw You Dancing... Days 16 - 18.

More Reverb creations. The prompts become more challenging and take more thought and consideration. So, here we go.

I'm loving playing with clipping masks, shabby shapes, gradients, and bevels and embossing!

Day 16: Who inspired you? What gifts did they give you? And how will you carry these forward in to 2013?

Image of Kim Klassen used with permission
Shape brushes thanks to DesignFruit: Shabby Shapes 

I gained inspiration from many places this year. Not to diminish inspiration I gain from other sources, but much of my focus was on taking pictures and Photoshopping.

Kobi, my sweet boy, often inspired me to put my socks and shoes on and get out the door. I think Kim Klassen and I have an immense love of our pups in common--and I love seeing pictures of her Ben. That helps me think others don't mind seeing Kobi as the focus of many of my posts.

Kim has been an incredible gift to me in 2012. Her drive, creativity, and sensitivity continue to inspire me as she continues the work she loves so much. I use her textures in many of my creations--they enhance and add depth to my bits of art. In addition, she has made learning Photoshop amazingly fun through her classes ... Photoshop Essentials, Beyond Layers, and Behind the Scenes! I don't think I would have learned so much and moved into original bits of art had it not been for her and Kat at Reverb '12. I'm having a blast creating this series.

And of course, I can't forget the inspiration nature brings. It calls my name and I go adventuring much more often these days, taking my camera, my muse, and my furry friend.

Day 17: How did you make a difference? Think of one person whose life you made a difference to in 2012. What did you gain from this? How will you continue to make a difference in 2013?

Textures thanks to Kim Klassen: warmlyvintage, gentlewhisper

In contemplating one person for whom I may have made a difference in this life, I am challenged. I would hope that I have made a difference in many people's lives by initiating Walk and Click Wednesdays and sharing photos throughout the year. And although Kobi is not a person, I know I made a difference to him!

So, with that said, I believe beginning Walk and Click Wednesdays four months ago has made a difference to many of my followers. One in particular, Sarah Huizenga, joins the link up regularly and has put it so poignantly ... "I found the more I went out the things to photograph just presented themselves like gifts. The real trick is just being open to whatever you come across that day." This is exactly what I'd hoped my readers and followers would understand about just getting out. Being open rather than looking for something to meet a prompt. Thank you, Sarah.

Interestingly, I think Walk and Click has made a big difference in my life. A gift to me. Offering me a new way to look at things. Giving me something to meet the day for.

Day 18: The colour of you? What colour best represents the year you had in 2012? And why? What colour would you like to invite into your life in 2013? Be as literal or metaphorical, clever or crazy, or just plain off-the-wall with this as you choose! Can't wait to read your responses to this one!
 

Texture thanks to Shadowhouse Creations: Square-27
Shape brush thanks to DesignFruit: Shabby Shapes

BLUE: My color is a paradox.

Some days I have felt quite blue over this past year of searching, but not to dwell on that. The other side of blue is its ability to open me up to new opportunities. To see the sky. To notice the different shades of blue in lakes and ponds and creeks. It helps me feel the movement from the blue of tears to the blue of the heavens where I can dance and sparkle.

There are so of my blogging and Flickr buddies I want to thank for continued support in your following. You lift me up when the going feels heavy. Thank you all.

I'm not sure what color I'd like to invite into the new year. Something to contemplate further. Maybe the yellow, orange, red side of the color wheel!